Ask the Rabbi with Rabbi Chaim Mintz
During the year following the passing of a parent or teacher, when mentioning their name, the child or student should say “hareini kaparat mishkavo – may I be an atonement for his resting place.” In other words, I accept upon myself any pain that should befall my parent or teacher, as atonement for their sins. How does a live person’s suffering atone for someone who already passed away?
Rabbi Chaim Mintz responds:
The Lofty Channel God’s Love to all Jews
The Mesilat Yesharim (Chapter 13 and 19), written by Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzato, tells us that one person’s deeds or suffering can have an effect on others, and even atone for their sins. Since not everyone is capable of reaching the same lofty level, members of our nation who reach greater heights of sanctity are able to channel Hashem (God)’s love and Divine Presence to the rest of the nation. He quotes the well-known Midrash that the four species on Sukkot represent the four levels of Jews – ranging from the highest to the lowest – and we bind them together to symbolize that the great ones will atone for those on a lower level.
Suffering as Atonement – a Special Kindness from Hashem
In his sefer Derech Hashem, Rabbi Luzzato elaborates on this concept, explaining that allowing one person’s deeds or suffering to atone for the sins of others is a special kindness with which Hashem created the world. This works as follows: Since all the souls of the Jewish nation are interconnected, whatever happens to one person can have some effect on the entire nation. One person’s sins can bring down the entire nation, and certainly one person’s mitzvot can elevate the entire nation, making them deserving of great blessing. Similarly, Hashem, in His infinite kindness, through this connection allows one person’s pain to help atone for the sins of others.
Our Good Deeds as a Merit for the Release of the Hostages
For this reason, after many of our brothers and sisters were taken hostage this past Simchat Torah, many people have accepted upon themselves to perform various good deeds, as well as abstaining from certain materialistic pleasures, as a merit for their release. Even one person refraining from indulgence on the other side of the world can bring a shower of Heavenly blessing to the entire nation, and help bring them home.
Our Souls are Closely Intertwined
The same applies for souls of the deceased, as they remain connected to the souls of people in this world. For this reason, people who perform mitzvot in this world can bring merit to the souls of the deceased. And this is certainly the case for one’s students and children, whose souls are closely intertwined with their parent and teacher, so any suffering they endure can serve as a merit for their souls.
In short: This is a special kindness of Hashem, allowing one person’s actions or suffering to atone for others. Because all Jewish souls – and certainly the souls of one’s students and children – are interconnected, any mitzvot they perform, or any suffering they endure, can serve as a merit for the souls of their deceased parent or teacher.
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